Here’s a story I wrote for my dad’s book, Silent Echoes:
Carrying the Load
by Anthony C. Herman
Sometimes we must decide which loads we are going to carry and which loads are better off left behind…
When I was a child, maybe 5 years of age, I went to Lake Michigan for a small picnic in the summer sun with my family and some relatives. Being a curious boy, I set off on some exploring around the beach and park area. There were a lot of interesting things to be seen there. At that age, you are adept at noticing good sticks, oversized leaves, and other aspects of nature.
After some time of exploring in the area and after noticing several unusual sticks, branches, and other objects of nature that were within my reach, I then noticed something special. What I had discovered was a beautiful, large rock that just really caught my eye. I studied it for a few minutes and figured I had to have it. It looked useful to me, and it was very appealing.
I then sought out my father, since he was close by with everyone else, and asked if I could take it home. He told me that I could, but I would have to carry it. That sounded like a fair deal to me, so I picked it up and began to carry it.
We had to walk a good way to get back to the car, and several times I had to put it down to regain my strength. I didn’t have much time to rest since every time I would, I ended up farther and farther behind everyone and not a part of the group anymore. I seemed to be the only one carrying a heavy rock, imagine that…but it was something I wanted.
When we finally reached the car, everyone was waiting and my father had the trunk open, all ready for me to put my special rock into (which felt more like a “boulder” at that point). He told me to put it into the trunk so that we could go. I stopped and thought about it for a second, as I was tired and out of breath. I told him that I did not want to take it home. Everyone except my father began to laugh. They thought it was funny that I carried this large rock all the way to the car, used all my strength to carry it, and now I did not even want it after all that work.
I have to admit now, that, yes, it does sound a little funny. But what I realized was that just carrying it to the car was a lot of work – too much work for me. It caused me to fall behind from the group, and it just took too much of my strength to own this item. After doing the work of carrying it myself, I found out that this great rock, which I thought was so magnificent, was not worth the work. It was better for me to leave it behind.
Often we all see things that we just need to have. We go out of our way and extend our resources to have it. Soon after we get it, we notice that owning it puts us farther behind and uses too much energy. At that point, we can keep owning it or we can drop it right there and cut our losses. Sometimes it is just better to drop the things that burden us rather than keep holding on to them, hoping that their false appeal will sustain us.
The echoes of this story reveal prior mistakes I’ve made in my life. They say hindsight is 20-20, and it’s so easy to dwell on the past. But I find that concentrating on failures only brings me down. I use this story as a future echo, if there is such a thing. What I mean is, by evaluating loads that I am picking up now or deciding to pick up now, it will resound echoes into my future. I can decide my own fate by making wise choices now.
It’s difficult to know what items to leave sitting when they look so good. But I find that after you leave it there, then turn around and keep going forward, you forget about it. That’s why, thank God, I don’t remember what that rock looks like. It’s not here with me. I would have had to move it to every apartment I lived in, and I would have had to find a place to put it – what a hassle! Maybe even friends of mine would have had to help me carry it, and it would have burdened them down, too. But I don’t miss it…I’ve been able to use the strength I would have spent on that stupid rock for other things more beneficial.
I’m not at all suggesting that we shouldn’t take chances. Life would be boring otherwise. The dilemma falls on knowing what to do with what you find. The greater number of good decisions you make, the easier life gets. The next time you see something that you just must own, or just be like, or just be involved in, take a second to account the cost of that material thing. Is it worth it to carry the load or wiser to just leave it and forget it? It can be easily forgotten.
Are you the owner of your possessions, or do your possessions own you? Are you depriving yourself of relationships with people, because you need to repair, maintain or otherwise tend to your material things, hobbies, habits or your achievements in your career?
Do not fear that people will laugh at you because you lowered your standards of living to have more time for family, friends or others in the world who need you – especially if you, also, elevate your standard of giving. You can downgrade to a car having fewer frills and gadgets; you can select a more modest abode, which requires less time, energy and money; and you can reshape the load you carry. Then enjoy your new-found time experiencing more of what is good in life. Fewer bumpy “rocks” makes for a smoother road.
The end.
